I wasn’t the only one who was drawn to a retreat for exhausted people. In fact, there were over 20 of us who made our way out on that cold January 20th morning to be welcomed by a hot breakfast prepared by the All Saints by the Lake’s men’s group.
Called A Still Small Light, this Epiphany Retreat’s full itinerary was posted throughout the space at the church, giving us a chance to mentally prepare for the rhythm of the day to come.
After breakfast, the Rev Grace Pritchard-Burson, our retreat leader, provided some words of welcome and orientation. This set the tone for a day of rest, reflection, meditation and restoration. When we entered the chancel space and huddled together to sing hymns and say morning prayer I was curious about how things would unfold.
I confess that I appreciate the opportunity to sing in community. This is one of the unique and special offerings of the Church and I am always moved by this humble yet powerful experience. So, when we joined together as a small but mighty chorus, accompanied by our friend and colleague, Neil Mancor on piano, I was officially in my element.
Following the chorus, Grace led an opening meditation, priming us for stillness. I started to notice how I was feeling, and it got me thinking – as we do when we are attempting to meditate, – that when things are too busy or we are too stressed or in our heads, we can find ourselves feeling isolated and alone. We feel stuck. At least, that is how I had been feeling.
To be honest, with everything going on in my life, the last thing I had time for was a full day retreat – but – at the same time, it was exactly what I needed. There is an old Zen saying: “You should sit in meditation for 20 minutes a day. Unless you’re too busy, then you should sit for an hour.” Just by being there, I started to let go and I feel my soul relax. The truth is, sometimes all you need to do is show up.
During the break there were times of silence. Prayer stations had been laid out in the beautiful sanctuary, carefully prepared for us to engage with. Having this structured time to consider what I needed was a balm for my soul. I felt so soothed and cared for as I made my way around the spectacular stone-walled space without a care in the world. I moved slowly and breathed deeply.
Eventually, I climbed a flight of stairs and found a couch to slump into. The space was lit by some huge lead-paned windows. I picked up a Bible and opened it without much thought or effort, taking comfort, allowing myself to get lost in the words. The simple act of reading and being present was fortifying. When the retreat bell sounded inviting us to return for another round of meditation, I was alert and prepared.
Meditation can reveal so much to us about the quality of our thoughts and our capacity for stillness and listening. It can sweep away cobwebs and invite us into deeper union with our Creator. I felt the tension in my neck melt and my heart soften. The meditations throughout the day provided the perfect balance of guidance and silence.
When we were invited to choose our own silent prayer time, I returned to the couch, let it hold me, and, covering my eyes with my hat, I fell into a gentle slumber. Breathing slowly and rhythmically, was both calming and restorative. My body and soul experienced a sense of deep rest that I hadn’t realized I needed.
Soon, we returned to the chancel for midday prayer and more singing and this is where the floodgates opened. My heart and soul were moved and I felt the Holy Spirit. Tears flowed down my cheeks. I welcomed the release, trusting that when emotions surface, they deserve to be felt and expressed. And so, I did.
We left the inner landscape and returned to the space we started in where, we enjoyed some conversation, lunch and fellowship. I was delighted to meet an inspiring 93-year-old woman who shared pictures from her youth. We crafted together and closed the day with sharing.
I was moved by the depth and insights from the participants of all ages and by the impact that a day of retreat had on each of us.
I am so impressed and grateful to the Rev. Grace Pritchard-Burson and her team at All Saints by the Lake for delivering a retreat for tired people, to allow us to be spiritually fed, (the hot breakfast certainly didn’t hurt either!) and to provide formal opportunities to enter into profound spaces of restoration and connection with ourselves, with God and with one another.
What I am trying to say is… thank you, I needed that!
